Friday, July 29, 2011

Weekly Weigh-In 16.0

Weigh-In
Last weigh-in: 332.4 lbs
Current weigh-in: 330 lbs
Change: -2.4 lbs

*sigh* I'd be lying if I said I wasn't sick of the number 329, 330, 331 and 332. That's where I've been hanging out on the scale since my June 3rd WI. *double sigh* I know I "took some time off" from caring, but now that I care again I'm really frustrated.

The good news is that my foot is feeling better and I'm hoping to be able to get walking again. We bought a new DVD player for our bedroom too, so now I can do my exercise DVD with the door closed and without worry my family will see me (self-conscious much?).

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

It hurts so bad!

Today my foot was feeling better so I decided to go for a lunchtime walk with some friends. We walked 1.86 miles down to a cafe for lunch and then back up to our office. The walk back is a looooong steady climb up an incline. When we got back to the office I could feel how hot my foot was and it felt like it was slightly swollen. I elevated it on some boxes and put an ice pack on it which seemed to help.

I wasn't done with the self-destruction though. Oh, no I wasn't.

The Kid was performing in a neighborhood parade and The Hubs called me at 4:30 to tell me that her helmet was in the trunk of my car. I left early and sat in The Worlds Worst Traffic Jam for 45 minutes, almost making me late. When I got there and parked, I had to run/walk up a hill on the hard pavement to reach them and then I had to walk down the parade route to where my mom was and THEN I had to walk back up the hill to get to my car after the parade.

By the time I got home I could barely walk and the top of my foot looked like a golf ball was stuck under the skin. Now I'm sitting here with ice on my foot waiting for The Hubs to get home and take pity on me and make me go to bed.

Monday, July 25, 2011

FAT GIRL DOWN!

I know. I should stop being so self-depricating.

Anyway.

My fabulous time yesterday on my bike is now clouded in misery. I was sitting in my office today and got up randomly and realized: "HOLY CRAP MY FOOT HURTS!" I think that riding my bike yesterday screwed my foot up. I broke this foot 10 years ago and ever since then I've had problems with my foot. Sometimes when I put too much stress on it problems happen! I don't ride my bike very much and I think the way your feet move on the pedals is what screwed it up.

I'm not a doctor...but I assume that can happen. My mom and The Hubs are both afraid I broke a tiny bone in my foot, but I don't think that's the case. Regardless of how it happened or what's wrong with it...icing it and keeping it elevated seems to help!

Here's hoping my family is wrong. They're usually right though...which, in this case...totally sucks.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Bicycling


I went with The Kid and The Parents over to the lake and we rode our bikes around. It's an almost 3 mile loop around and we went around once. I would've been up for going around once or twice more but my.butt.hurt.so.bad. By the time we got around the first time, I thought I could keep going and we were about to head over by some soccer fields and try a quieter trail, but we ended up collapsing under some maple trees and people watching. I had to explain to The Kid that people watching isn't the same as creeping or stalking. I don't think she understood.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Weekly Weigh-In 15.0

Weigh-In
Last weigh-in: 329.8 lbs
Current weigh-in: 332.4 lbs
Change: +2.6 lbs

I feel fortunate really. The last two months I've done nothing to lose weight...almost no exercise, I've not been monitoring my food intake and I've been depressed. So to only have gained 2.5ish lbs is somewhat remarkable. I'm happy that I'm back on track and that I didn't completely waste all the work I did in previous months.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

So...

Yeah yeah yeah. I'm a terrible blogger. And worse than that? I'm also a terribly depressed, bad dieter. Ugh.
 
Anywho - I finally had enough of the darkness around me and went to see my doctor. He prescribed me Wellbutrin. That on top of the thyroid medication I'm on, should help my mood...and my internal body temperature (I feel like I'm burning up ALL. THE. TIME.)...and help my motivation, which should eventually all combine together to help me with my ultimate goal here which is to lose weight and feel better about myself.
 
One of the things I've committed myself to doing again is recording my points. I *thought* even though I'd stopped recording them, that I had a pretty good handle on what I was eating and thought maybe I could drop WW and just start monitoring my own food intake. Out of curiosity though I recorded a daily food diary and almost passed out. I was going way over my points, and didn't even realize it. I felt like I was in control before but I was slowly but surely slipping and losing control and not paying attention to my diet.  I was eating lunch out more and more, which means fast food.  My dinner portions were getting bigger - and greasier - and I wasn't making breakfast smoothies anymore, choosing to skip breakfast completely most days.
 
Things obviously had gotten to a very low point for me and I finally snapped myself out of it.  I went to the store and bought a bunch of Lean Cuisine meals.  My favorite is the Garlic Chicken steamer lunch, but they're kind of expensive so I bought a few of those and bunch of the normal lunches in different varieties.  The only kind of frozen lunch I have a hard time getting on board with is mexican food.  I just can't eat frozen tortillas.  The pasta dishes and the "comfort food" type dishes are what I tend to stick with. 
 
I think I just have to keep reminding myself that losing weight is a process.  It's not easy.  I think what baffles me most is that you don't even hardly notice when you're gaining...it's so easy...and fun (One time...in one of my darker days...I ate Popeyes Chicken EVERYDAY for a week for dinner.  The 4-piece meal.  It was fun...and made me feel good...at the time.) 
 
Anyways - here's hoping people that read this are still doing well with your weight loss...and here's hoping you still come around here to see what I'm up to!

Monday, July 18, 2011

Food phases and cravings

A friend of mine and I were talking about lunches and how we go through "phases" ... Like when I ate a salad with a grilled chicken breast on top everyday for three months and then got burned out on it. Then I went through my chili phase (I ate it everyday for two weeks before coworkers started asking if we were doing alright financially. *sigh*) ... Now I seem to be in a Lean Cuisine phase with a piece of fruit, some string cheese and baby carrots on the side. Right now I'm convinced that I could live off of Lean Cuisines. I want to eat them for breakfast lunch and dinner.
 
I've also recently had a serious craving for hotdogs. I bought at Costco for lunch a few weeks ago, I ordered one at Five Guys, and I think about making them for dinner every night (I don't. I couldn't do that to my family.) I feel like I just need to eat them, like eating one RIGHT NOW would make me feel better, I'm imagining them like they're some sort of mouth watering delicacy that will just melt me to the floor when I take that first glorious bite. Sick. I know. It's a freakin' hotdog. But this is what I deal with!
 
When I was a kid and I'd have cravings for something I wouldn't normally eat, my mom would say it's your body's way of telling you that you need a key nutrient that the food you're craving has in it. So if you're craving spinach when normally you're all like, "Ew disgusting. Don't TOUCH me with spinach"... then maybe your body is trying to tell you that you need an iron boost. I don't hate hot dogs, I'll eat them but I've never craved them the way I've been craving them. And since hotdogs are kind of made out of leftover animal parts, I'm wondering what kind of nutrients they have in them. I'm a bit afraid to google "hot dogs" though because of what may show up...so I'll do some more research on that some other time.

Anyway, I'm going to go find some hotdogs now.

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Still truckin' along

I'm feeling better than I was two weeks ago in my last post. I'm still sticking to my plan and getting in as much exercise as possible.

I've not posted any weigh-in updates or posts in between because life has been...well...very busy! My daughter is out of school now, The Hubs is still looking for work, we're in the middle of planning a huge overseas trip and my job is getting more and more stressful and busy.

In the middle of all that, I got my test results back. I don't have Cushings Disease or early menopause, but I do have a slight problem with my thyroid so they have me on a small dose of meds daily. They're not confident that will help me with weight loss, but it can't hurt - right?

Have any of you ever tried natural dopamine pills? I can't remember the name of them and they are not with me right this second...my sister sent them to me and wants me to try them. They're supposed to improve my outlook on life (her words...not mine) ... The Hubs doesn't want me to try them, and I'm a bit hesitant, although curious as well. Anyway, if you've had any experience with them good or bad, please fill me in!

I've gone back to salads for lunch, although I mix it up every other day or so with one of those new Lean Cuisine Steamers lunches...they're all kinds of amazing. They are like the bags of frozen veggies you buy...you put the bag in the microwave, and it steam cooks it for you. The only complaint I kind of have is that you have to scrape the sauce out of the bag and sometimes it gets messy.

I like them better then the ones that come in the plastic trays...someone told me once you aren't supposed to heat food up in those black plastic trays or eat out of them and even though I'm not much of a conspiracy theorist, it is one of those random things that stuck with me and I never got over.

My weigh-ins have been going well too! I lost two lbs two weeks ago and yesterdays weigh-in I lost 3 lbs. I'm now back down to 329 lbs. and I hope to keep it going down. I'd really like to be able to use my Wii Balance Board BEFORE Christmas so that I can say I used it the first year I had it! I'd also like to lose weight before our big trip in September!

Anyway, if you're still here reading - I appreciate it. I'm going to try and visit everyone's blogs this weekend! I wish you all well in this journey!