Wednesday, June 15, 2011

A giveaway!

I love free stuff! One of my fellow weight loss bloggers, Diaries of a Fat Girl, is giving away a BondiBand...go here to enter!

I'm totally using excuses now

What the heck?

I was so "off" everything last week that I didn't even do a weigh-in. I'd tell you how, what, when and why, but really those are just excuses. When really I just haven't been doing it. I've slowly started pushing "losing weight" into the back of my mind, where it slowly dissolves into a non-priority and before long it just doesn't exist anymore in any form except the "I'm so fat...I need to lose weight." line that I use 1,000 times a day.

When I was dedicated to it, going through the process of following my plan, getting exercise everyday and actually working towards my goal, I felt great. I had confidence again. I didn't feel like a super model, but I could feel myself being healthy again. I felt good about myself.

Now that I've been slacking for two weeks, all that confidence and self esteem is gone. I am so unmotivated and unhappy that I feel worse than when I started this journey in February. I feel worse because I know I can do it. I have proof. I have proof that I can lose weight and the only reason I'm not losing weight is because I pretty much gave up.

I hit some road blocks, a minor patch of rough "real life" issues came up and what did I do? I threw in the towel on weight loss and let the rough patch consume my whole life. I sit around after work, completely immersed in some Netflix streaming movie instead of getting out and exercising. When I go for walks now, it's to the corner...just long enough for The Dog to do his "dog bidness" and come home again.

So anyway, here's to hoping that soon I find my mojo again. I need to find my motivation and my energy to want it again. This feeling of nothingness is nowhere to live long-term and I need to find that one thing that will snap me out of it.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Weekly Weigh-In 14.0

Last weigh-in: 326.8 lbs
Current weigh-in: 329.8 lbs
Change: +3 lbs

Holy crap! Where did that come from? My biggest gain yet! Yikes! Granted, I did overdo the food intake a tiny bit this week. Between the birthday lunch, birthday dinner, and cake w/ice maybe the incredibly delicious, yet not quite healthy, Chicken Enchiladas that I made this week...I can totally see where maybe a pound or 3 of that could've been avoided :-/

Although. Gosh. Those enchiladas were so good I can still almost taste them!


Next week is a new week. Right?

I've still not done the test for the Cushings Disease I talked about last week...I'm having a hard time being home for a whole 24 hours! If you miss a "sample" then you have to start all over again and you have to do it for a whole 24 hours. I'm either out at the lake, at work (which, if we're honest here, I'm not going to do that at work. Can you imagine having to explain the big orange container you're keeping in the staff lunch fridge that you carry to the bathroom everytime you go? Yeah, no thanks!)

As of today I also still haven't gotten any of the other test results back either. I'm assuming it's because of the long holiday weekend, but if I don't see test results in my inbox early next week, I'll be contacting the doctor.